im feeling very emo moley, its a feeling that i really dont know how to describe. firstly im leaving a company which i really had lots of memories. the friends i made, the times i enjoyed myself and experience that i had in this company is truly too much for me to handle at this point of time.
and some how it doesnt help when i feel my friend whom i will love to talk most to is not talking much to me. maybe its his way of telling me that its not possible between us but i really didnt think of that right now cos i know i have to handle my own relation. even though at the back of the head, i wish he will reciprocate it but to think of it, its my own doing and wish not to talk to him.
so i cant do much or comment anything
but the truth hurts. it hurts so badly that you know you feel for someone whom you can dont even talk or even ask abt how the person is and you just wonder if he is fine or even happy. and the worse part is you are scared to take the first step to making the friends hip work cos you dont know how he will react towards you. you wish you know the solutions but sometimes you are just too lost.
i hvent have this feeling for such a long time and i know it means more than ever.
the worse is things got complicated with my current relation that is not working well and rocking in my emotions. i dont know how am i feeling towrads it and yet be so sure of how i feel towras the other. its just so weird. do people feel weird with that. so what should we do abt it?
there are so many questions in my head and so many thoughts that go wild and i wonder why cant i stop feeling so emotional. its just so wrong.
and its just so tiring.
i wish i can stop it with one palm and like how the traffic light stops the cars.
my munchie say just keep rolling like a ball but sometimes when the ball rolls too much, it feels as though it lost its direction and not where it feels like going.
its just so lost
i ask the almighty one what should i do, the things i need to look out for and whether i should stay and somehow at the back of the head, despite me feeling like giving up, i am asked to stay
and i reallyu dont understand why. i really tried. but yet. i had no reply.
